Seventeen laws, seventy mistakes: A football referee’s survival guide for Tanzania

DAR ES SALAAM: LET me not waste your time. The problem with our refereeing in Tanzania is not complexity, conspiracy, or even pressure from fans.

The problem is far simpler and perhaps that is what makes it so painful.

Imagine, there are only 17 laws in football and we are somehow treating them like a 400-page legal document.

Seventeen. I repeat – seventeen. 17!

If I were a referee, I promise you this with the confidence of a man who has seen one too many questionable offside calls, there would be no complaints. None.

You might disagree with a decision, yes, but you would never be confused.

And confusion, my friends – referees, players, managers and those passionate uncles in the stands – is the real enemy here.

So come, gather round. Let us talk properly. No shouting. No blaming.

Let me teach you what these seventeen laws are really about, because clearly, we have all, at some point, decided to freestyle.

First things first – the pitch. It is a rectangle. Those lines are not artistic decorations drawn by an overenthusiastic groundsman.

When the ball crosses them fully, it is out. Fully. Not “it looked like it might have been close.” Referee, if you are unsure whether the ball is out, you have already failed.

Assistant referee, that is your moment. Raise the flag with confidence, not like you are asking permission from the crowd.

Now the ball itself – round, predictable, obedient.

Unlike some of the decisions we see. Do not complicate it. Watch the ball, not the noise around you. The ball tells you the truth. The crowd will lie to you without shame.

Then the players. Eleven on each side. I am amazed I even have to say this. Substitutions are not a free-for-all market in Kariakoo.

A player leaves, another enters and the referee controls it. If people are wandering in and out like it is a family gathering, then you, dear referee, are not in charge.

And that is the beginning of your downfall.

Now let us talk about equipment. Boots, shin guards, proper kits. This is not a fashion show, but it is also not a place for chaos.

If one player is properly equipped and another looks like he came to jog on the beach, you stop the game and fix it. Authority is not about shouting; it is about standards.

Ah, next the referee himself. The star of our weekly dramas.

My friend, your whistle is not for decoration. Blow it with purpose. Make decisions like you mean them. Footballers can forgive a strict referee; they cannot respect a confused one.

Assistant referees, please, I beg you, participate.

You are not there to enjoy the match from the best seat in the stadium. When it is offside, signal it. When it is not, stand firm. Do not let fear of insults turn you into a statue.

Timekeeping? Ninety minutes. Add time for delays. This is not guesswork or storytelling. Do not invent time because the match feels “interesting.”

We are not directing a film here. When time is up, it is up. Blow the whistle and go home peacefully.

Restarts – kick-offs, dropped balls – simple procedures. Yet somehow, we turn them into small controversies. Ensure fairness.

Everyone knows when play starts. No surprises, no tricks. We are not playing hide and seek.

The ball in and out of play, again, fully across the line. I feel like I should print this on T-shirts. Fully. Across. The. Line.

Not halfway. Not “from my angle.” Fully.

Now we come to goals. The purpose of the game. Score more, win.

But if the goal itself is born from an offside position or a clear foul, then what are we celebrating? A mistake?

Referee, you are the guardian of fairness here. Take that seriously.

Then here comes Offside! The great Tanzanian mystery. Let me simplify it for everyone: it is about position and timing. Not emotion. Not crowd reaction.

If a player is ahead unfairly when the ball is played, it is offside. If he is not, let the game flow. This is not a lottery. Stop treating it like one.

Fouls – this one is almost embarrassing.

If you trip a man, it is a foul. If you push him unfairly, it is a foul. If you handle the ball, it is a foul. Consistency is all we ask.

Do not punish a gentle touch and ignore a full wrestling move. This is football, not a wrestling championship.

Free kicks – these are taken from the correct spot. Not two metres forward because someone negotiated well. Referee, you are not a diplomat. You are an enforcer of rules. Stand your ground.

Now…. Penalties… If it is a foul in the box, give it. If it is not, do not.

This is not the time for hesitation or popularity contests. You will be criticised either way, so you might as well be correct.

Throw-ins – honestly, even schoolchildren get this right. Both hands, behind the head, feet on the ground.

If a grown professional cannot do this properly, call it back. Do not pretend you did not see it. We all saw it.

Goal kicks – place the ball, kick it, move on. Why we turn this into a negotiation remains one of life’s great mysteries.

Corner kicks, same story. Ball in the arc, take the kick, defend or attack. Simple. Clean. Efficient.

You see what I am doing here? I am not introducing anything new. I am not inventing complicated systems or calling for expensive technology.

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I am simply asking all of us – referees, players, managers, fans – to respect what already exists.

Because the truth is, the game is simple. We are the ones making it difficult.

And now, let me address you, the fans. Yes, you with the loud voice and the creative vocabulary.

Passion is good. It is what makes our football alive. But understand this, if a referee applies the laws correctly, even if it hurts your team, respect it.

And if I were in the middle, applying those laws with precision and you decided to insult me without reason, I would not only show you a card in spirit. I would very seriously consider taking you to court. Respect must return to our game, one way or another.

To the managers – control your benches please.

You set the tone. If you behave like every decision is a personal attack, your players will follow and the match will descend into chaos.

To the players, play football.

Not theatre. Not politics. Football. And to the referees, my dear colleagues in potential, this is your moment. You have seventeen laws. That is all. Learn them. Trust them. Apply them.

Do not fear the crowd, do not chase approval and do not complicate what is already beautifully simple.

Because once you do that, something magical will happen.

The noise will reduce. The confusion will disappear. The game will breathe again.

And maybe – just maybe – we will finally stop asking the same tired question every weekend:

“Ref, what exactly were you watching?”