TANZANIA is a very interesting country, and I know most of you will agree with me, because there are things which are considered normal happening in Tanzania while they are not, mambo mengi tu.
Apart from chips mayai which is only found in Tanzania, there are some other things which separate Tanzanians from the rest of Africa, and if you are a real Tanzanian, then you will know some of them, utayabaini tu.
Recently a neighbour of mine came knocking on my door on Nicodemus hours, the hours which are considered ungodly because normal human beings are usually asleep, and I thought that he had an emergency at his house, nilishtuka kidogo.
This fellow was holding a small pink envelope, and when I approached him, he handed it to me as if he was handing me a fat cheque, nikajua nimepata bonge la zali.
Anyway, before I opened the small envelope, the fellow who was fidgeting as if he had an army of red ants in his pants told me that it was a special invitation for me and my better half, but of course contribution was needed, yaani kumbe ni mualiko na mchango…… wa kipaimara!! “You see Papa Shango, you are one of those neighbours who command respect, that is why I decided to come personally and give you this card, I hope you will not disappoint me, nakutegemea sana mzee wangu!” he said.
I had a few unpalatable words to tell him, because he had just disturbed me from a deep slumber, and I did not take it kindly when someone does that on flimsy reasons. Kusema ukweli nilikasirika.
Okay, because sometimes I consider myself a gentleman, I sent him my contribution, and he told me that he will put me on the list of very important guests on the material day, mbwembwe nyingi tu.
Anyway, the kipaimara was last week, and of course my wife and I were in attendance, but things were not what we expected, ilikua ni vurugu mtindo mmoja.
The fellow had not paid for the venue, and even before the ceremony began, the furious owner of the venue, who happened to be his landlord, told him that he could not continue with the party until he coughs up his money, kusema ukweli ilikua ni mambo ya aibu.
You see, this fellow and his wife had even taken soft loans for the kipaimara, but because of the extravagance he wanted, things did not go the way they intended, mwisho was siku ilibidi tuondoke tu. One thing I don’t understand is why people go to extra lengths to host a big number of people on the excuse of kipaimara, yaani kiukweli huwa sielewi kabisa.
Hivi kwani mliambiwa kipaimara lazima iwe kama harusi?
You find someone who earns peanuts trying to impress his neighbours with a lavish party, all in the name of kipaimara, and he is later left with the task of repaying loans he took for the occasion.
What I came to discover is that Tanzanians will look for any kind of excuse to have a blast, and this includes kipaimara, weddings and graduations, mnajiumiza nawaambia.
Hivi what is wrong with you taking your family for a small dinner somewhere to celebrate the kipaimara if you really have to celebrate? Kwani ni lazima kuingia gharama ambazo sio za lazima? The problem also comes because some people have the habit of trying to imitate their friends, just because your neighbour had a lavish party at his place does not necessarily mean that you have to ‘revenge’, kwamba lazima na wewe umuonyeshe.
That is why there are young couples who start their marriage life by repaying loans which they took so that they can have a colourful wedding, simply because so and so did the same, mnakera.
Live within your means, if your pocket does not allow you to have a massive wedding, then for crying out loud, just do a small thing and get it over with, sio kusumbua watu na michango kila siku wakati maisha yenyewe mnayaona.
You find someone transporting his whole clan from the village to attend his wedding, kumbe hela yenyewe ya mikopo, and some of us are forced to part with our hard earned cash to support your whims, hii sio sawa, I tell you.
You end up feeding a bunch of strangers simply because you want people to praise you on the way you conducted your wedding, hizi sifa zitawapeleka pabaya, I can assure you.
Eti you feel happy when people talk about your lavish wedding…… kwenye harusi yake watu tulikunywa mpaka tukarudisha chenchi aise! What they don’t know is that you are left with hefty loans to pay simply because you wanted praise, hivi inawasaidia nini kwa mfano? I will very much understand if someone collects money so that they can further their studies, ama labda kuna mtu ni mgonjwa, that one I can understand, sio kutusumbua kwa michango ya harusi ama kipaimara kumbe mnatafuta sifa tu.
If you really must hold kipaimara for your child, it is all well and good, but try to go within your means, usilazimishe kitu simply because someone else did. Ukitaka kuoa, it is all very fine, but please, try to budget around your financial ability, mambo ya kuvizia watu na kadi za michango sio sawa, in the end you risk losing friends, I assure you.
Some time back there was a young fellow who committed suicide a few months after his wedding….. and when I say wedding, I mean a real wedding, a very expensive wedding. But kumbe what people who appeared for the wedding and drank themselves silly didn’t know is that the guy had to take a hefty loan from the bank to cover for the wedding, and when the bank came calling, the pressure was too much for him, akaamua kujiua.
Live within your means, nitawaambia kila siku, the habit of trying to copy what others do will cost you, nawaaambia kabisa