SUCCESSFUL entrepreneurship is the buzz word these days.
In a news item titled: “Why determination, practice, vital for entrepreneurship growth” (Daily Blog, June 30, p. 11), an example is narrated, of a man, who, from humble beginnings, is now a person to reckon with, when it comes to the development of the fishing industry in this Country.
The story-writer informs us, in para 3, as follows: “Mr SA, 40, a resident of Bukoba is a living example of a dreamer who worked hard to fulfil his dream. For 20 years he worked as a fisherman in the fishing community, dreaming ‘to’ own a ‘fishing factory’, one day.
Today, his dream has come to reality, and he owns a ‘fishing’ factory that ‘process’ and ‘export’ fish ‘abroad’”. Let us take a pause from reading the rest of the story, and look closely at the paragraph above. In the first instance, we are left wondering whether there is such a thing as a “fishing factory”.
A factory is a building or group of buildings where goods are made. Factories do not fish. We therefore feel that instead of a “fishing factory”, the writer should have settled for “a fish processing factory”. This brings us to our second observation.
SA’s factory, ‘processes’ and ‘exports’ fish; not what the writer presented before us, that the factory ‘process’ and ‘export’ fish ‘abroad’. This is because, we are talking of one factory, and the corresponding verbs must reflect this situation.
Note as well that we have dropped the word ‘abroad’, for the good reason that, “abroad’ stands for “in or to a foreign country”; while “export” means “to sell and send goods to another country”. Thus, when we talk of exporting fish, as in this case, we mean selling and sending this (processed) fish to another country.
“To export fish abroad” is therefore tautological. We can economise on the words by leaving out “abroad”. Reading through the article, one gets a feeling that Mr SA was never a fisherman, that is, he never took to the waters to get hold of, or harvest, fish.
However, he was dealing in fish, like, for example, buying fish from fishermen (the water-faring guys) and selling to consumers or other traders. Bearing this in mind, we propose a re-write of (part of) the paragraph as follows: “For 20 years he worked as a dealer in fish, dreaming of owning a ‘fish processing factory’, one day.
Today, his dream has come to reality, and he owns a factory that ‘processes’ and ‘exports’ fish”. Mr SA is thankful to the government for “prioritising industrial development since this has provided opportunity to ‘mere citizens’ to invest in the sector”.
“The government effort”, he is reported to have remarked, “has allowed him to extend his market out of the Tanzanian ‘boarders’” What did the writer mean by: “mere citizens”; and by “Tanzanian boarders’? We think he had in mind: “ordinary citizens”; and “Tanzanian borders”.
A boarder is a student, who lives at school, as opposed to a day student who attends school from home. On the other hand, a “border” is a boundary. To sell things outside Tanzania’s borders means to sell to neighbouring countries and beyond.
Government efforts have enabled ordinary citizens to invest in factories and to sell goods outside the country’s borders. Note that we have gone for “government efforts” instead of “government effort”. Mr SA had some advice to offer:
“Calling all ‘fisheries’ to maintain ‘unite’ and should not be afraid of anything, but maintain their faith in all struggles they put to bring positive change”.
A fishery is part of a water body, where fish are caught in large quantities, so I do not think fisheries would pay attention to any call to maintain “unity”, or to undertake any other activity that human beings do. How about saying: “Mr SA called on all those interested in the fishing industry to forge unity, and…”