If you want respect, avoid living with relatives

Dear nephew Milambo

GREETINGS from this city under the sun, where rain has become a scarce commodity and the sun shines as if it is on a mission.

I hope that by the grace of Limatunda you and your family are doing okay, and all the people of my beloved Ukumbisiganga.

I hope that your daughter is doing okay at the moment, because your aunt told me that she was not feeling well.

From what your aunt told me, it is obvious that the child was suffering from common cold, which as the name implies, it is a common ailment in children.

You remember my good friend Dr Sufian, he is a very good friend of mine and a reliable doctor, that is why I always consult him every time there is a sickness, whether it involves me or any other person, that is why when your aunt told me about the child, I did what I usually do, I consulted him.

Dr Sufian told me that there is no cure for the common cold, and that most children recover from colds on their own.

He told me that antibiotics don’t work against viral infections, so you are not supposed to administer that, and all the same, the child is too young to start taking medications.

The doctor told me that instead, treatment should be focused on helping ease the child’s symptoms until the illness passes.

But apart from that, I always beseech Liwelelo and the Nyamwezi ancestors to protect you and your family my dear son, so you should relax because I know that things are going to be okay.

Your aunt sends her warm greetings to you and your family, although she is still in a foul mood because she was involved in a war of words with a lorry driver on her way home.

You remember our road from the main road, the way it is in a poor state, and how vehicles have to use a snail’s pace to avoid the holes and poor terrain.

Last week we were informed that they are going to construct a new road for us, which is wonderful news to us, because driving on that road is a nightmare.

So it is because of that they had to create an alternative route for us to pass, which is a very narrow pathway behind that church we passed the other day when we were taking a walk.

Because the road is narrow, the local authority directed big vehicles like lorries to use another alternative route, and leave that one to smaller vehicles, because the road is too narrow.

But you know how these lorry drivers behave my dear son, because despite the directive from the local authority, they still force their way on that narrow road, and that is how one of them came face to face with your aunt.

Your aunt was still fuming when she told me that the arrogant driver refused to back down and allow her to pass, because the way that path is, there is no way two vehicles can pass side by side.

Before I started writing to you, I had to call our local area representative and tell him that they should do something about the situation, and he assured me that they are working on it so that lorries can be banned from using that route.

Anyway, although your aunt is fuming, she also found me fuming when she came home, and this is because there are some relatives of hers who are living with us.

My dear son, about four days ago, I was watering the garden when there was a loud knock on the gate, it was around 1 pm, and when I went to open, I found four unfamiliar people standing outside, and when I asked them how I should help them, they told me that they have come to visit their relative.

Because it was obvious I was not their relative, I knew it had to be your aunt, and because she was not at home at that time, I had to call her and ask her whether she knew anything about visiting relatives.

I tried to describe the people to her, but eventually I had to hand over the phone to one of the people, a thin fellow who looked as if he was about to weep.

After a few minutes, I could see that your aunt had remembered them, because the face of the fellow who looked as if he wanted to weep changed and was replaced by a happy look.

My dear son, those people were indeed your aunt’s relatives, and they included the weeping fellow, who happened to be his cousin on her mother’s side, his wife who looked as if she lifts weights in her spare time, their son who had a lazy look on his face, and his wife who was very pregnant and who looked as if she was ready to offload any second.

You can imagine my confusion my dear boy, because according to your aunt, she had no idea that they were coming.

My dear son, although your aunt was fuming because of her episode with the lorry driver, as soon as I finish writing this letter, I am planning to confront her and tell her to get rid of her relatives.

My dear boy, I don’t know which part of the country those people cropped from, because first and foremost they are chaotic, destructive and lazy.

Just the next day after they arrived, the tap in the public bathroom broke down and water spread all over the house, a few hours later the public toilet was blocked, which led me to believe that maybe they were using newspapers as toilet paper.

Imagine all of them wake up past 9am every day, as if they are on holiday, and before they even wash their faces, they raid the kitchen, harassing the poor house help in the process as they demand for food.

Usually I pride myself as a very patient person, but my patience has worn off my dear boy, it is either they go voluntarily or I kick them out by force.